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2017高考全国1卷、2卷英语作文赏析

时间:2018-07-17 15:53 点击:
「高二首次全国大模考」成绩已经全部公布,高二的同学们首次模拟真实高考,成绩相当耀眼哦!这是一个良好的起点,接下来的300多天里,大家还需要稳扎稳打一点一

「高二首次全国大模考」成绩已经全部公布,高二的同学们首次模拟真实高考,成绩相当耀眼哦!这是一个良好的起点,接下来的300多天里,大家还需要稳扎稳打一点一滴提高。

今天,我们邀请猿辅导的核心老师,就2017高考英语作文进行详细、专业的点评。你不仅可以学习到别人写作的优点,也能看到他们在作文上犯的一些错误,以后多多避免哦。

Enjoy!

2017高考全国1卷

假定你是李华,正在教你的英国朋友Leslie学习汉语。请你写封邮件告知下次上课的计划。内容包括:

(1)时间和地点;

(2)内容:学习唐诗;

(3)课前准备:简要了解唐朝的历史。

注意:

1.词数100左右;

2.可以适当增加细节,以使行文连贯。

学生实例1

分数:23.5 广东湛江一中

Dear Ieslie,

As scheduled, we will have a Chinese lesson next weekend .Considering our students are preparing for their final exam,I suggest we have the lesson in the park near our school.

The mainly course of our class is to learn the poem of Tang Dynasty.It's universally acknowledged that the poem of Tang Dynasty is one of the solid foundations of our culture. A large number of talent poets showed their view about the society and expressed their satisfaction with the beauty of our motherland. You can broaden your horizon and have a better understanding of our colorful culture through this study.

Knowing the history of Tang Dynasty is better for you before having class. It's the society that creates the brilliant poem.

Yours

Li Hua.

点评:本文要点覆盖较全面,文章结构清晰,语法错误较少,长短句运用合理,结合了简单句同时运用了较多的复杂句式,如主语从句It’s universally acknowledged that…,强调句型It's the society that…非谓语结构作状语Considering our students are preparing for…等等;同时恰当使用了一定的高级词汇如solid foundation,broaden one’s horizons等。

建议:1 文章要点方面,建议时间更精确些,比如下周周几几点到几点;2 语法方面,注意细节语法的错误,比如mainly改成main,poem改成poems等。

学生实例2

分数:20 河南光山二高

Dear Lesile

How are you? I have learnt your progress in your Chinese with my help and your hard work. I am writing to tell the plan that what should you do in advance.

First, let's make it at eight o'clock in school library. We can consulted a number of books about the subject there. Second, the next theme is about Chinese culture especially the Tang poems that are full of history and act. I believe you will be attractive once you put your heart. Third I need you to perpare some work. The Tang poems are based on the Tang dynasty

so you should to look through the history and great happening.

As the saying goes no pains, no gains. Chinese is so beautiful and difficult that you need be involved sincerely. I am looking forward to starting our study.

Yours,

Li Hua

点评:本文要点覆盖较全面,文章结构较清晰,有恰当的衔接词使用,长短句运用较合理;同时恰当使用了一定的常用句式及谚语,如as the saying goes,no pains,no gains等。

建议:1 文章要点方面,建议时间更精确些,比如具体是哪一周哪一天的8点;2 语法方面,注意细节语法的错误,如can consulted改成can consult等;3 逻辑方面,注意词和词之间的单配逻辑,如you will be attractive once you…逻辑上不是很通顺;4 单词拼写上,注意拼写的准确性,如perpare改成prepare等。

学生实例3

分数:22 日照一中

Dear Leslie,

How's it going? Have you absorbed all the knowledge I taught you last time? Now let me tell you the information of next lesson.

I will give the lesson on next Saturday morning, from 8:00 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. at 101 Room in the teaching building in our school.

We are going to learn about Tang poetry, which is an extremely important part of not only Chinese language but also Chinese culture. What you need to do in advance is to know briefly about the history of Tang Dynasty. You can consult the Internet or the books I gave you. Besides, don't forget to review what you have learned before.

I am looking forward to our meeting. See you next week!

Yours,

Li Hua.

点评:本文要点覆盖全面,行文流畅,有额外的细节添加,结构清晰紧凑,语法错误较少,运用了一定的复杂句式,如定语从句which is an extremely important part…,主语从句What you need to do in advance is…等等;同时有一定的词汇亮点如absorb,extremely替换了very等。

建议:句式方面,可以适当再增加一些高级句式。

2017高考全国2卷

假定你是李华,想邀请外教 Herry 一起参观中国剪纸(paper-cutting)艺术展。请给他写封邮件,内容包括:

1. 展览时间、地点;

2. 展览内容。

注意:

1. 词数100左右;

2. 可以适当增加细节,已使行文连贯。

学生实例1

分数:24分 四川德阳中学

Dear Henry

I'm Li Hua, the leader of the paper-cutting club in our school. Last time you told me you looked forward to learning more about traditional Chinese culture. Now I'm glad to tell you there will be a Chinese paper-cutting exhibition held by our school. I sincerely hope you can set aside some time for the art feast.

The exhibition, the theme of which is "beauty of China", will take place in the school hall from 2 to 5 on the afternoon of June 21. Not only will our club's works be displayed, but we also have a valuable set of paper-cutting created by a famous artist of this field. Besides, there will be a lot of useful and interesting activities, from which you can have a clearer picture of Chinese culture.

I would appreciate it if you accept my invitation. I'm sure it can leave a wonderful impression on you! I'm looking forward to your reply.

Best wishes!

Yours,

Li Hua

1. 逻辑性较好,层次分明,连贯恰当;

2. 运用词块、句型丰富;

3. 个别用词需要改进比如说leader, leave a wonderful impression不符英语表达习惯;

4. 第一段不够简洁。

学生实例2

分数:23.5分 岳池中学

Dear Henry,

I have known that a Chinese paper-cutting exhibition whose subject is about Chinese festivals will be held in our city.

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